They just keep coming-Stories of how she impacted their lives with just a smile and more!

Carol at the Apple Barn Pigeon Forge Jan 2013
a month before she died.

I recently finished writing a book about my daughter, Carol Hensley Singletary, and have been in the unofficial mode of editing, revising, crying, and laughing as I go. As you may have heard me state much of the book " Carol's Smile, The Life and Legacy of Carol Hensley Singletary" (self published through Xulon Press) is input from her family, friends, and even a few short-term acquaintances.

I thought I would share some of recent conversation with a young friend of Carol's who now lives in 'out west'. She knew Carol briefly when she attended Antioch Baptist at the same time when they were both in the youth group She told me how Carol always made her feel "included" and not an outsider . This young lady mentioned to me that she didn't know Carol real well and they only hung out a few times along with Andrea or Jordyn. But she told me "last time I visited back in April I actually went with my dad and we visited Carol at the cemetery. I brought her a couple of flowers and sat there just sort of talking to her and praying for you all. It meant alot to me to be able to be there, especially since I couldn't make it home for her funeral. I guess the reason I am messaging you is just to let you know, and i'm sure you've heard this a million times, but I am so deeply sorry that this happened. Carol was such a beautiful person and I just hope that with time things will get a little bit easier. I am always keeping you all in my prayers."

I was impressed by her honest and sweet spirit. I replied to her: Isn't it crazy how you feel out at the cemetery and standing there and you talk and feel like she really might hear? I don't go there often. I went a couple of weeks ago when i finished the manuscript of the book. I told her i hoped that i did her justice through the book. And i have been thru the 'why her. Why not me? And even the 'it is just not fair'. And in my quietness to try and hear..


She spoke of her emotions at the cemetery: "being there and talking to her, I expected to feel very sad but I got this overwhelming sense of peacefulness almost. I, and im sure you do as well, believe Carol is very happy where she is. She is with God and could not be safer. And i'm sure she is so proud that you're her mother. "


Wow I was again struck by how Carol's spirit makes people feel such a peace. I asked if she had seen the video of Carol's Celebration of life and she said " yes I actually watched it the day it was posted. It was absolutely beautiful. It brings so much joy to my heart to see how many people loved her and were there for her. And i've been praying so hard for Cooper as well. You are all so strong and so blessed to have eachother, especially during this hard time.

"Thank you!" to Carol's sweet young friend for this note to me . It came at just the right time --when I needed a little pep talk. I am not sure she knew it was that to me but it made me very happy. I told her the next time she is back home to give me a call so we can chat some more. I am sure there is a funny Carol story or two that she can share and we will laugh and smile and be thanksul that her legacy lives in many hearts and in many ways!

Judy

aka "Carol's mom"

Nov 25 2014

My poem about Carol

Poem for Carol –aug 2014

I am having one of those days

Looking at pictures and saying your name.

Carol, Carol, Carol….. that smile of yours

How can it be?  Is it even bigger on your face?  

I really know the answer –it has got to be-- because it was worn so much

And now it is in God’s presence  and it can only be brighter

It is right where it belongs…spread wide because of HIS grace—

And I bet it is singing a song!

You know that while you were alive

I was so proud of all you accomplished

I made some noise and made it known (and to you it was no surprise)

Yeah,  I was the proudest mom and I wanted to be recognized

As the mom of the one out there on the basketball floor

Making things happen no matter what the score.

I never did write you a poem while you walked this earth

Maybe ‘cause I was too busy traveling all over the place

(watching you do everything good, I don’t want any of it to be erased)

And now it is later, you have gone away from here

Made your life with cooper and a business with cell phones

A dog, new friends, and college to go along.

And then …unexpectedly..you were gone.

No longer an earthly  beacon of encouragement but to heaven you went home.

How could that happened?  I thought you’d live to be a ripe old age

But I guess God had other plans and he needed you in heaven---

I don’t know why  He didn’t ask me if it was OK.

So I sit here and look at pictures of you,

My daughter, my friend, the one I thought would see me to the end

You were the one….. made from my very being

 ….my heart,

……….my soul….

……….my song

….gone too soon, …

………………………. my heart not only hurts—it aches.

  Will it ever be the same?  Please God, I can’t take this pain.  

At other times , I can thank God for the 19 years of wonderment

That your life filled us with

And I hope one day God will say to me….

“Good job, Judy! on raising this one.”

You just thought she was easy, but she had challenges

Yet she made the best of them because she knew my Son.”

I want you to know, Carol,  I am more than happy that you were married

To that  awesome guy , Cooper …who made you happier than I could have believed.

Your life was so full, how could any of us want it to stop?

So many  questions come to my mind, and I try not to  ask “why?”

Because I know even if I had an answer ….the hurt of losing you would still be alive.

So I carry this burden until l die

When I know we will be reunited and I’ll no longer cry

And maybe all the questions will be forgotten when I look into my Father’s eyes

And I am reminded that I am in GOD's presence and no more tears will flow

And  all my heart will want to do is sing and praise HIM so.

After which He might say “Here is someone who you have been waiting to see

A special angel nmedCarol!! And to her HE will say "Look who is here!!!

It ‘s your MOM and  she is still so very proud!!!!”

At that time..when I see you in the midst of GOD’s glory my heart will be whole again..

I can imagine how much brighter your smile will be

As I hug you and kiss you and I’ll  feel at right at home

And we’ll laugh together forever

When you say to me “Mom, for once could you be ‘on time?’ I thought you’d never get here!
 I’m so glad you’re here now…and we can let the party begin!!!”

And then I can just hear you  say “let me go get the others”

And you’ll return, escorting my family and friends to greet me…..

Exclaiming, “Look ! Mom is here!”

Oh how my heart will soar with joy

As the reunion that has just started  and will go on forever more.!

Judy Hensley

Aug 22, 2014

Our daughter Carol Hensley Singletary died in Feb 2013 in a tragic accident at her workplace.   She was 19 years old and just been married 6 months to Cooper Singletary.  It has been almost 3 very hard years, but my hope comes from knowing she is in God’s presence and waiting for us to join her.  Rom 8l38-39

Some Days the Pain Just Comes Crashing Through

You may be tired of hearing me talk of Carol.  It has been a year and 5 months and sometimes it seems just like yesterday that she was here.   Last night Bill and I both had a 'moment' as we call it.  The time when missing her is so very very hard.  He was in the kitchen and i turned and looked and he was all choked up.   I of course asked 'what is wrong?' knowing the answer.    He said "I just miss her so bad."  And all I can do is hug him, tell him I am sorry, and that I love him.  And sometimes I can hug and not cry, but last night I could not.   We shared a kleenex box to wipe our tears and some of the pain away.

I went and sat in the rocker that our neighbor gave us before she was born.   When I sit there sometimes I feel her as a weight on my legs and a warm feeling on my chest.  It helps because I hear her say "it is OK momma, really...it won't be long until we are together again.   I told Bill about the feeling I get sitting in the rocker.   He did not sit there...at least not when I could see him.
 
I don't know how long it is supposed to take...maybe never.  I don't want to forget her...ever.  I am trying to write a book about Carol's life.  Some days there  is  progress and some days it is just too hard.  

We still see Cooper on occasion. And he is good to come and visit us on holidays.  I don't even know how hard it is for him.   I just ask the LORD to send him  a beautiful someone...with a spirit more special than Carol's so that the void in Cooper's life will be replaced.   And he will smile that smile of complete contentment again someday.

I got a note from my niece by marriage in Texas.  She is pregnant and expecting a little girl in September.  She said they were going to give her a middle name of Carol.   That made me smile.  And maybe someday, the tears will be gone, but she will live on in our hearts.  I see her everywhere I go.  In a sweet little baby, in a curious toddler, in the innocence of  little child looking for their momma or learning something new.  and in the passion of a young lady running up and down a basketball court, and in the lives of her friends who carry on knowing their lives were somehow made better by knowing  and loving Carol Hensley Singletary.

I love and miss you so very much Carol.  I hope you are proud of me and daddy --we are trying so very hard.   love you always and forever ...MOM.